White People Thread

Matt-Matt- stewPosts: 21,585 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited January 2013 in AKA Donkey
inb4 didn't read lol

It seems we are a fascinating species to the black people of the ic. so much so that those people even made a thread dedicated to all the great "non-black' posters of the IC.

So, white people of the IC, I invite you into this thread so that others can try and live vicariously through us as we share/discuss the following things:

-larry bird

-owning obedient dogs that don't have to be pit bulls

-how we are the reason our president is black

-not having to look up the word "vicariously" in the dictionary

-our fathers

-apple products

-understanding at a young age that our success in life isn't determined by our jump shot.

-still having an impeccable jump shot

-great defense and ability to hustle

-larry bird


-power tools

-fitting clothes

-understanding that we don't have to become youtube rappers/ beat makers just to make it.

-still being able to create amazing raps and beats in our free time.

-larry bird rapping

-not having the lights/heat cut off at our houses

-money left over 3 days after pay day

-direct deposit

-never stepping foot in a "payday advance" type store

-using phones that aren't pre-pay

-never saying, "you know how we do" or "You already know what it is"

-understanding sarcasm

-eating casseroles

-top shelf cereal

-having things in our kitchen other than neck bones, pork intestines, pork intestines, lard

-eating chicken and noodles......not "noodles with chicken flavoring packets"

-being able to use our normal voice in all situations (they call this their "white voice")

-having conversations with our friends that doesn't turn into everyone trying to talk over everyone else

-not having to deal with any sort of racial insult against us

-larry bird

-having friends/family members that don't steal from us or don't need bail money

-going to the thrift store to buy clothes, nah, i mean to donate our shit cause we have too much and because we understand that it is a tax write off

-not having to use our middle names on job applications

-not creating fake middle names for ourselves on facebook

-reflecting on the advantages of having names without apostrophes, prefixes, or suffixes.

-having decent jobs

-having a hustle that doesnt even require leaving the house

-having our own yard

-attending/graduating from colleges other than university of phoenix

-using non-clear deodorant if we so choose

-having curly hair and it being ok

-having a bad hairline and it being ok

-going to get a hair cut without being hassled into buying bootleg dvds

-a trip to the barber isn't an all day event because we have other things to do.

-being full participants in activities at swimming pools, water parks, lakes, the ocean, etc...

-larry bird

-speeding on the interstates and how we think the cop flashing its lights in our rear view mirror is coming for us, then it just drives right by and pulls over the black guy driving the car that was going the speed limit.

-all the shit that we bought INSTEAD of buying Jordans

-all the shit we did with our time instead of waiting in line for Jordans

-beating jordan by using bird in the game "Bird vs Jordan"

-brent barry winning a dunk contest

-never owning birdman lugz

-being able to fly in any weather using our frequent flyer miles

-buying things that we actually like, not because we see or hear rappers talking about it

-all the shit we bought instead of buying dr dre's headphones.

-going on ancestry.com and actually being able to use the website

-dying and having an open casket funeral without having to worry about people taking a picture of our corpse w/ their phone

-knowing people that die or go to jail and still being able to wear our normal clothes instead of weaing "RIP....." or "Free...." t shirts.

if you have stories that pertain to these scenarios, then feel free to share. Or just share more examples of white privilege.

Also feel free to post your paychecks, diplomas, savings account balance, clean criminal records, or if you just want to ether those people who will try to discredit this thread...thats ok too. But lets see who hates the most that way we can know who wins the bet that we all made.

and just so nobody feels left out...people of all colors are welcome in this thread if they want to make fun of jamaica
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