5 days before I preached a sermon on homosexuality, I got this comment on my blog.
“Keep your phony ass biggot bullshit and you pious sense of higher status to yourself you price of trash. You can try to stop me all you want but you are still a nigger and a cult leading fag. No wonder your father didn’t see you for 11 years. Who would be proud of their nigger son starting a cult.” -Jesus.
I tell you what, I’ve never felt so hated. I wish I could say I his words bounced off me like bullets on superman cause I was wearing my spiritual cape but I can’t.
Nope. No super spiritual response here.
Just a discouraged pastor who wanted to crawl up in a hole and not come out. I know I won’t get any “hall of faith” votes for saying this but I honestly wanted to quit ministry, life, Jesus and everything.
All because some Internet troll blasted me on my blog. And on twitter. Then on my blog again after bypassing my filter. Then on a new twitter account after I blocked the first one. Then back to my blog on a new IP address. One last twitter account. How about more blog comments?
Over and over again Jesus (as he called himself) berated me and called me the ‘n word’ more times than I care to remember. Over 50 comments later, I was sitting in a corner balling my eyes out because I felt so hated by “Jesus”.
In desperation I prayed for Jesus to make “Jesus” go away.
I asked for him to make me feel better, but he didn’t. Jesus didn’t make me feel better, no, he did something better. He said…
“Now you know what it sometimes “feels” like to be gay. Now you know what the gay community has to face from family/neighbors/the church.”
And BOOM, just like that, God blind-sided me with a 100m/hr curve ball that literally left me breathless and in tears.
It’s like God used the words of an ignorant troll to cut open my heart open then he filled it with love for the gay community.
I literally didn’t know what to do but cry and say sorry.
That’s how I started my sermon on homosexuality 5 days after “Jesus” trolled me online.
The Holy Spirit trollin now!! Lol
Read the rest here: http://www.prodigalmagazine.com/jesus-called-me-the-n-word/
5 · ·