Welcome to 2013 folks... Where it’s "All THIRST everything"

I.B. BlackmanI.B. Blackman Posts: 3,127 ✭✭✭✭✭
A girl wants a relationship- "Why is this bitch so thirsty? She should just be content fucking me with no strings attached, putting mileage on her pussy, and hoping it leads somewhere."

A guy wants sex- "Why is this nigga so thirsty?... Yeah, I post pictures wearing nothing but pasties and talk about how I wish someone would give me some bomb head, but that doesn’t give him the right to inbox me!"


...Apparently everyone is thirsty and liking someone or even giving them an innocent compliment is cause for ridicule. Black people are blessed with the mutant power to take a word and overuse the hell out of it. We’re like the fucking Smurfs, all these words in the English lexicon, yet we choose to latch on to one, make it mean whatever we want it to mean, then run it into the ground.

Take the word Hoe, Ho, or Heaux (if you’re fancy) for example. If you want to take it to mean a woman who sleeps around for status or goods, cool. But in the hands of Bitter Nigga Smurf it means a woman who got him to splurge on Texas Chainsaw tickets and didn’t fuck. In the hands of Bitter Ratchet Smurf it means a rich white woman who dared to get pregnant by Kanye West. Don’t even bother to correct their definitions because that too is “hoe shit”. Now we have the word “Thirst” being blown out of proportion and misused. People have always been “pressed”, “hard up”, “infatuated”, etc… but “Thirsty” just rolls off the tongue so much better.

I remember carrying a girl’s books for her in middle school. Was that thirsty of me? Well, according to you ignorant bastards being nice to a girl is the same as texting a picture of your dick at 4am. This year a ten year old boy won’t be able to give his classmate a Valentines card because the dreaded “T” word will be dropped on him. “You gave her a Princess Jasmine cut out heart? Nigga you thirsty!”

Death To Screen Shots/Grabs


A lot of you are perpetuating this thirst craze for two reasons, either you want to draw attention to the fact that you’re getting attention, or you want to embarrass someone who’s not showing you attention anymore. Strippers, Hood Models, and random internet flirts, want EVERYONE to know that they are wanted. It’s not enough to be confident, take nice pictures, and live life. They need thirst to validate how much of a bad bitch they truly are. Every day a tabloid site has a screen grab of a text between some Buttaface freak with low self-esteem blasting a ball player or entertainer. Look yall, he’s offering to fly me out of town for a weekend, the thirst is REAL!!! What we don’t see is the 73 text messages before that where she’s talking about how good she sucks dick. Because those women get infamy from doing that dumb shit, average hoes have jumped on the bandwagon quicker than a new 49ers fan. Ratchelle Ray can’t catch the attention of a rich nigga, so she thirst traps an internet lame then puts him on blast so she can feel just as special. Look yall, he asked how my pussy taste, the thirst is REAL!!! What do you get out of that besides a tiny bit of online attention? Likes don’t equal $ and Retweets don’t deposit into your bank account, so why are you trying so hard to get noticed? Some goofy looking dude in a fitted hat sent a message asking to eat your box. OMG! Call TMZ, you’re famous! Sit ya happy ass down. Screen grab the part where you met him at a motel and asked him to cum in you.

One of the reasons women give for going public with acts of thirst is often, “He disrespected me, so I had to air him out”. If he’s out there leaking nudes and calling you out your name, I still don’t approve of stooping to that level, but I understand it. However, all it takes for some woman to feel scorned is for a guy not to call her back or shower attention on another woman. Let’s get this straight… you fucked him… knew he had a girlfriend… and it was all good. But once he stopped responding to your texts or had the nerve to set his Facebook picture as his new bitch, he disrespected what you two had? Let’s call a spade a spade, you were hurt and wanted to embarrass him so you went back into the folder on your PC labeled “Texts-Skypes-Chats” and exposed him for being a guy who sends really horny messages. Water is wet, the earth is round, and men like to talk dirty. You haven’t exposed shit that isn’t common knowledge, you’ve just made other men leery of talking to you, and other women think you’re messy. If you’re getting ballers to take you on trips, washed up rappers begging to suck your toes, or have dudes with girls begging for nudes, congratulations, you are in demand, but don’t let it gas you up. You are not the first or the last creature with a vagina to get that level of attention. Bad bitches get offers to get their ass ate every week, it happens to you once and you’re acting as if you’ve won the lottery. He’s being thirsty for sex while you’re showing how thirsty you are for attention, and guess what– we’re laughing at both of you.

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