I'm watching football, ordered pizza, the guy arrives and was mad at me for writing a bad review. I sent it on a Christmas card, for some reason. He said, did you write this? I looked at it and say yes. He drops the pizza and swings on me. So, I tackle him and end up kicking him off the porch, he falls back. He comes up and says 'that's $25', I pay it and he leaves. We acted like nothing happened.
So, so I eat that shit and my kid comes crawling out the AC vent. I'm like wtf, I'm thinking of my wife sees this, she's gonna call the cops on me for thinking I put him in there.
Then, something explodes in my freezer and it was a 2-liter bottle of Pepsi I had forgotten.