I Should Slap The Shit Out You: Ashamed
"High School Musical My Azz"
It's Senior Year my last year of HS; the first steps to "the real world" Pre-HS Graduation. I finally have a GF now (let's say HS sweeheart) and its the first day of school. Me and my GF had been "a couple" since the end of my 11th grade year so basically this wasn't that 30 day "trial run" that alot of HS relationships were based on.
All Summer long we kept in touch THE WHOLE SUMMER EXCEPT WE NEVER SAW EACH OTHER NEITHER. Hint (problem) #1
It's the end of school and ol girl had been duckin me like the plague all day long so before I get on the bus I looked for her but she was nowhere to be found. Later that same evening I try calling her but she had been ducking my phone calls (SUDDEN COLD-SHOULDER) Hint (problem) #2.
Next day it's early in the school day and finally I "bump" into her. I approach her to hug her but she has this hesitation about her kinda vibe I picked up on. (GUILTY FEELING OF UNEASINESS) Hint (problem) #3.
School is over and I AGAIN look her before I get on the bus and AGAIN SHE'S NOWHERE TO BE FOUND. Then the strangest thing happens, her homegirl (the irony is that I approached the homegirl first WAY EARLY in the 11th grade but she shot me down) is looking for me. I'm about to step onto the bus when she calls my name and waves for me to come into her direction. I approach her and right on cue straight no chaser she tells me that my GF had been cheating on me.
Whatever was left from the ETHER/SOUL-CRUSHING I encountered my 9th grade CAME BACK WITH A VENGEANCE THIS GO ROUND!!!
The ETHER was so monumental and devastating that I purposely chose to not bother getting on the bus but instead I "just felt like" staying after for school and my HS wasn't exactly "walking distance" from where I lived at the time (try a good 30 minute drive).Luckily my boy Oscar drove to and from school so I gave him $3 gas money (WE TALKIN 1994 WHEN $3 GAS MONEY WENT A LONG WAYS AND MEANT SOMETHING).
I was on straight mute status the entire ride home when out of left field Oscar puts in Ready To Die in the tapedeck. Some might say it was a strange sense of therapy but Ready To Die officially became my soundtrack of life. The venom Biggie was spittin on "Gimme The Loot, Machine Gun Funk, Warning, and The What" had me literally on some "fuck the world don't ask me for shit" mentality.
Guilty As Charged: the effect of this ETHER in contrast to my first "life story" resonated so deep that IT affects me now to the point where there was a time when "getting to know a female I show a slight/good/great interest in" I'd have no reservations about spilling the beans. Now I have no choice but to limit/ration the idea of "opening up to females".
Food for Thought (Jewel): " A wise person never tells all"
"Somethings are best left unsaid..........Somethings don't need to be said................Somethings should NEVER be said (goes to the grave with you)"
Short story that still feel a slight burn from.... anyways I knew this shorty growing up she was this sweet thing like a solid anyways she was first girl i kissed so i always had little crush on her growin up fast forward too freshman year of college we chattin up im making serious progress while im away at school talking that talk saying how we should take things to another level when i get back. Shes wit i even make a super simp youtube video of how im feeling her which somehow got leaked to my whole uni anyways i get back i bought her this necklace thinking fuck it im go above an beyond any guy she might be talkin to to seal the deal. Come back from school and link up wit her she lives like 30min from me we link up i give her the whole i wanna make her wifey business and give her the necklace. She was overwhelmed said she felt the same way and took the necklace. Nothing went on that night cause it was mad late and i was like fuck gettin some wont even be an issue i have all summer. The very next day her phone was disconnected and i didnt hear from shorty for rest of summer. I asked my teammate randomly about her he told me she had pawned the necklace and that she had started strippin n trickin soon after i had came back then he was like did you fuck her? I was like naw nigga feelin all salty then hes like aight good she gave a man the clap like a week before you came back fast forward 5 years later i see shorty at the club and she asked me to take a picture wit me an how good it was to see me " All i could do was laugh at this ho i'm about to have my masters all while being debt free , my current shorty is by far better looking and personality wise as well as being college educated and this bitch is still stripping and sucking dick to make a living... I took my Ls but i learned from them the look of shock on her face of me leaving the club and getting into my x5 gave whatever was left of my soul some dignity back.... but reading through these stories that shit has been put into perspective n it wasnt even bad as i once thought it was lol