to all the people saying they have the same amount of freedom they did before they have kids, not sure i buy it. and i'm not talking about travelling or extravagant shit at all. can you decided to just up and leave at the spur of the moment without getting a babysitter? can you go out of town without getting your friends or family to watch your kid? do you get woken up at the ass-crack of dawn on the weekends cuz they wanna eat? can you decided to do some day drinking on a whim one weekend? the answer to all of that is no. i can decide right now that i'd rather go to a restaurant that isn't chucky cheese instead of making dinner
lets not even get started on how much kids talk, how much of your attention they demand. you don't get a second off when your kid is around. unless it's men who usually don't do as much of the caretaking as women do, i don't see how you can say having a kid doesn't eat up a large portion of your time and energy. i mean if you want to undertake that task, more power to you. but i'm perfectly happy not having to do any of that shit. and if you get fulfillment out of being a parent, great, but that doesn't mean everyone will or that that is the only way to get fulfillment out of life.
As u mentioned men don't have to deal with the burden of parenthood like women do. It's a sacrifice for sure.. And you do have to be more calculated in how you do things. There is an adjustment.. But for the most part I can do what I've always been able to do.. As I mentioned in an earlier post. It takes a village... Extended family is very important. My parents are retired and they'd love nothing more than to watch thier grand child.. So it works out..
The overall sentiment some of the parents are trying to make is that yes there may be additional steps associated with doing certain things but for the most part they can all be done.. Children aren't as much of a hindrance as folks would like to portray them.. Especially as they get older..
the bolded is key tho, you can't deny that they are a hindrance, you're only arguing about how much of a hindrance they are. some people don't want to deal with ANY hindrance, zero, zip, zilch. so any amount of hindrance, regardless of how small it is is undesirable
i think it's better that folks who understand this about themselves don't have kids instead of doing so cuz they think it's what they're supposed to do and resenting their children later. i don't want the additional steps, i don't want to be finding babysitters or asking my family to watch them. i don't want to have to drive them all over the god damn city, i don't want to be up reading the same book every night. i don't want to have to wait to do adult things (including sex) until they are in bed every night
none of those things appeal to me in the least. you're right tho, kids aren't that bad and can even be helpful once they get older, but i don't want to go thru 12-15 years of the bullshit i listed before they can even be left home alone. no thanks