What's up everyone. We are doing a contest with T.I. and we are giving away $1200 a day for the next 10 days. Just wanted to give you all a heads up.
https://www.allhiphop.com/ti

The Rhyme

DillaDeaf
DillaDeaf Ol' Deaf Bastarddownstate IllinoisMembers Posts: 4,802 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited June 2010 in Roc Tha Mic
Let's get it...

Yo, Yo,

Attack of brainacs vs supervillans maniacs
My hearing aids be deadly audio tonic
Like boomerangs at speed supersonic
I'm an ol deaf bastard
Steppin ice cold in the yard
Ya won't get far
Cause I got a ghetto express card
If i die tonight
Let me dream of the first light
When my sight tight
Scream out loud for Death's delight
I'm graspin the microphone
Dyin off a full stomach of patron
Alone in a zone
Usin 9-milly like a phone
Now Cerebus lickin my bones
Shot that dog wit my desert eagle
Use a Cowboys helmet
To 🤬 a Philly Eagle
Saw Jay-Z 🤬 Satan
While rhymin D'Evils
I take a 🤬 - it's a hit
It get no better than this
If i'm innocent
Why I 🤬 wack rappers
With a ghost rider penance?
Forgiveness? Nah, BRO
It's Ballin before HOES
Like Frodo with the ring
I'ma ghetto pharmacist
Stay stealin Trick Trick's bling

Comments

  • Tha Killa
    Tha Killa Members Posts: 4,451 ✭✭✭
    edited June 2010
    Let's get it...

    Yo, Yo,

    Attack of brainacs vs supervillans maniacs
    My hearing aids be deadly audio tonic
    Like boomerangs at speed supersonic
    I'm an ol deaf bastard
    Steppin ice cold in the yard
    Ya won't get far
    Cause I got a ghetto express card
    If i die tonight
    Let me dream of the first light
    When my sight tight
    Scream out loud for Death's delight
    I'm graspin the microphone
    Dyin off a full stomach of patron
    Alone in a zone
    Usin 9-milly like a phone
    Now Cerebus lickin my bones
    Shot that dog wit my desert eagle
    Use a Cowboys helmet
    To 🤬 a Philly Eagle
    Saw Jay-Z 🤬 Satan
    While rhymin D'Evils
    I take a 🤬 - it's a hit
    It get no better than this
    If i'm innocent
    Why I 🤬 wack rappers
    With a ghost rider penance?
    Forgiveness? Nah, BRO
    It's Ballin before HOES
    Like Frodo with the ring
    I'ma ghetto pharmacist
    Stay stealin Trick Trick's bling

    This section in the bold was pretty damn clever man. My only gripe is that you used the word "eagle" twice while constructing that punchline and I think that kind of repetition took away from an otherwise great line. This was a pretty witty keystyle though and I'd love to see more of your work in the future.