As much as I hate agreeing with some of the guys on this site-one thing that I grudgingly admit is that women do tend to allow emotion to rule. I don't think this is always a negative but in terms of dating/relationships it does misguide us a lot. We are taught from a very early age to buy into the 'happily ever after', that true love is this grand thing and it will conquer all. (this is similar to boys being taught never to show emotion-can you see an issue already?)
So we want this feeling you describe and most get it in the form of lust. While in this lust stage of love we excuse or flat out miss all sorts of things. We think well he isn't this but it's okay because no one loves me like he does. No, no, no. Phase 1 of love:
[i"]Here is a partial list of chemicals that exert an enormous influence on Phase 1:
Phenyleteylamine (PEA) is a natural form of amphetamine our bodies produce and has been called “the molecule of love.”
Pheromones, produced from DHEA, influence sensuality rather than sexuality, creating an inexplicable sense of well-being and comfort.
Ocytocin has been called “the cuddle hormone.” It compels us to get close, and when we are feeling close (to anyone) we secrete it. It is secreted by the posterior pituitary gland, and stimulates the secretion of dopamine, estrogen, LHRH, and vasopressin.
The cascade of “in-love” hormones and neurotransmitters of Phase 1 is highly selective and multifaceted in the experience of love and limerance. It is also generally accompanied by poor judgment, so that people will ignore the red flags that they will inevitably confront in Phase 2 of love".[/i] https://gottman.com/blog/the-3-phases-of-love/
Lasting love is going to go through many stages and it's going to test you, possibly in ways you never even thought of. Love and feelings ebb and flow-that is okay. You might be in love but go through times where you just love him and vice versa-you're just more friends. Holding a man up to the standard of having to have that feeling is a pretty impossible standard. Once you get passed the lust/courting stages can you see yourself with a person through financial difficulties, illness, children (or none), can you forgive that person for lying, for hurting you, for taking you down to the bottom of the barrel? Can you even imagine these things will happen? Any of these things or more can happen because we are human and we fail, we hurt people intentionally or not.
We all love differently-choose your mate on the ability to love him/her and how they love you back. This does not always match up and it may not always be with a person that gave you butterflies. I am not saying don't listen to your heart-but listen to your mind and your gut too.